Home of the Braves

This is a comedy about a blacklisted Hollywood directortrying to film her first family TV show on an extremelysmall budget. Starring: Kimberly Coburn - as Kayla Brave. Kenneth Byrd - as Raydell Brave. Djarese Blevins - as Troy Brave. Mary Jenkins - as Davonna Brave. Amir Byrd - as Tarrin Brave. Teresa Suarez Grosso - Felicia - the Director. Anthony De La Cruz - Greco, the Cinematographer. SOUND FX & SAMPLES PROVIDED BY: * FREE SOUND.ORG * PRO MUSIC PACK.COM * LOOPERMAN.COM * GLITCHMACHINES.COM * SOUND EFFECT PACK.COM * LOOPMASTERS.COM * ZAPSPLAT.COM. MUSIC PROVIDED BY: * PROMUSICPACK.COM * LOOPERMAN.COM. Our Website is: https://www.skitz-o-phonics.com/

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Home of the Braves

Love is funny sometimes (S1 E6)

December 23, 2020 • eArL Hamilton, Jr. • Season 1 • Episode 6

Neighbor Vito thinks he's in love again and Davonna wants to pierce her belly button.

Cast:

Kim Coburn (Kayla Brave)
Kenneth Byrd (Raydell Brave)
Mary Jenkins (Davonna Brave)
Djarese Blevins (Troy Brave)
Amir Byrd (Tarin Brave)
Teresa Suárez Grosso (Felicia De La Puente)
Anthony De La Cruz (Grecko)
Troy Garrison (Vito Tang)
Pamela Davis (Laweena)
Jaymee Lynn (Waitress)

This is the post roll (outro) for each episode.

Support the show

Be sure to check out our website at https://www.skitz-o-phonics.com/homeofthebraves, which includes pics and credits, plus more entertaining content!
(R.I.P. Ken)

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - DAY

CAST AND CREW ARE GETTING READY TO RECORD ANOTHER EPISODE.

FELICIA

Alright Greco, light it--

RAYDELL

I'm sorry.

FELICIA

(to herself)

I literally believe I'm going
crazy.

(to Raydell)

What is it Raydell?

RAYDELL

Well, our house payment is due so
we were wondering when we're going
to get paid?

FELICIA

I've gone through this with you
already. On the back-end! Meaning
you'll get paid after we start
getting sponsors.

KAYLA

But you want to wait until we
record all twelve episodes?

FELICIA

Yeah. You've got it Kay-Kay.

KAYLA

Well what about our bills?

FELICIA

The sooner we get this all
recorded, the sooner we all get
paid, so let's just hang in there
a few more weeks, huh? Yeah, it's
gonna sting a little, that's what
we call paying your dues, not your
bills, right Greco?

GRECO

Right. I haven't paid a bill in
months, and it's stinging like a
mother bear who can't feed her
cubs.

FELICIA

See. See! We're all in the same
boat. Now are we ready to record
everybody?!

RAYDELL

(glum)

Yes. Let's do it.

FELICIA

Alright Greco, light it up!

GRECO

Home of the Braves. "Love is funny
sometimes."

SFX: CLAP BOARD

FELICIA

And... action.

THEME MUSIC PLAYS

-----------------------------------------------------------

FADE IN:

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - DAY (DAY 1)

RAYDELL AND KAYLA ARE IN THE KITCHEN EATING LUNCH. VITO
COMES THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR.

VITO

I've got great news you guys.

RAYDELL

What's the great news, Vito?

VITO

I think I'm in love again.

RAYDELL

That is great news... again.

KAYLA

No it's not, you're supposed to be
in love with Galacia.

VITO

I was, but she's playing so hard
to get, I'm giving up on her.

KAYLA

(slight panic)

No. You can't. The sooner you two
get married and have kids, the
sooner she can leave us alone.
She's a good woman.

VITO

Then why does everybody keep
saying she's crazy?

RAYDELL

Because she is.

KAYLA

No she's not.

RAYDELL

We've been married for over
nineteen years and she's still
hounding me, harassing you.

KAYLA

Yes, but she's really sweet, Vito.
Ray will help set you up on a date
with her, right Ray?

RAYDELL

...I don't know.

VITO

I don't know either, I'm really
liking Laweena right now. But she
makes me nervous, my hands start
sweating, my bunion throbs and my
feet itch.

KAYLA

It just may be too much gluten in
your diet.

RAYDELL

Okay, first of all, just relax.
You don't need to put on an act
for anybody, just be yourself.

VITO

Thanks. I really appreciate your
advice.

(beat)

Hey, you guys have any foot
powder?

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - DAY (DAY 1)

TROY IS SITTING ON THE COUCH LOOKING THROUGH A SPORTS
MAGAZINE. DAVONNA ENTERS IN VERY CHIPPER AS SHE HEADS
TOWARDS THE TELEPHONE.

DAVONNA

Hey Troy.

TROY

Whatever it is, the answer is no,
"D". I'm reading right now.

DAVONNA

I just need to use the phone.

TROY

When are you getting a new phone?

DAVONNA

(chipper)

Dad says I have to come up with at
least half, so I have to sell a
few more beats first.

TROY

Okay, I give up.

DAVONNA

Give up on what?

TROY

How can you be so happy without a
cell phone? It got washed and
dried, yet you're still walking
around here smiling like
everything's alright.

DAVONNA

(walking over to
Troy)

Well Troy, I'm just happy that my
life is finally coming in tune
with the universe and my bio
rhythms are synchronizing with the
interplanetary forces of nature.

TROY

So what does that mean in Earth
terms?

DAVONNA

Just what I said, my life is
finally--

TROY

Yeah-yeah, I heard you the first
time.

TROY CONTINUES TO READ HIS MAGAZINE.

DAVONNA

I'm using the phone, so keep
quiet.

TROY

You keep quiet.

DAVONNA GIVES HIM A SNEER THEN WALKS BACK OVER TO THE
PHONE, PICKS IT UP AND DIALS A NUMBER.

DAVONNA

(into phone)

Yeah it's me again. I have this
dilemma, can you tell me what I
should do?

(pause to listen)

Okay, I think I will.

DAVONNA HANGS UP.

TROY

Please tell me you're not going
for all that phony psychic stuff.

DAVONNA

It's not phony. It happens to be a
very celestial discovery that man
is finally beginning to
understand.

TROY

So what did the celestial psychos
tell you?

DAVONNA

They're not psychos, they're
psychics.

TROY

Oh yeah that's right, the people
who call in are the psychos.

DAVONNA

See Troy, I knew you wouldn't
understand.

TROY

Understand what? Come on Davonna,
that zodiac stuff is just for fun.

DAVONNA

Okay, I'm having fun then, is that
a crime?

TROY

What did they say?

DAVONNA

None of your business, Mr.
Blabbermouth.

TROY

Blabbermouth? What are you trying
to say? That I can't keep a
secret? Do I look like some
gossiping old biddy? Some stool
pigeon who has nothing better to
do than go around telling someone
else's personal secrets?

IN THE B.G., TARRIN COMES HALFWAY DOWN THE STAIRS. HE SIT
DOWN VERY QUIETLY AND UNNOTICED.

DAVONNA

Alright Troy, but you better not
tell anyone, especially mom or
dad.

TROY

Okay, I promise.

DAVONNA

(still hesitant)

I'm going to pierce my belly
button.

TROY

I'm telling dad.

TROY HEADS FOR THE KITCHEN.

DAVONNA

Troy!

TROY

Just kidding, just kidding. What
do I look like, some kind of
gossiping ole biddy--

DAVONNA

(shunning Troy)

Yeah-yeah, I heard you the first
time. Just remember, you promised.

TROY

This sounds crazy. Body piercing?
You're not serious, are you?

DAVONNA

Yes I'm serious. All the cool
girls have 'em, and the guys love
'it.

TARRIN (O.S.)

I know one guy who won't love it..

DAVONNA NOTICES TARRIN ON THE STAIRS SMILING AT HER.

TARRIN

...Dad.

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS (DAY 1)

RAYDELL, KAYLA AND VITO ARE STILL TALKING

KAYLA

I'm sorry for trying to push off
you off on Ray's ex-wife so much.
It's not about my happiness, it's
about yours.

VITO

Thanks.

KAYLA

So tell us something about this
date of yours, Vito.

VITO

Well, she loves jet skies and
watching cartoons just like I do.
And she's got this cute little
laugh that you can't help but
love. She's a very nice and
respectable young lady.

KAYLA

(insincere)

Good for you, Vito.

VITO

But I've got one little problem.

RAYDELL

Let me guess, you car is in the
shop again and you want to borrow
mine.

(taking his keys
out)

No problem, just make sure you--

VITO

No, I don't want to borrow the
car, I want to borrow you guys.

KAYLA

What do you mean borrow us?

VITO

Not really borrow, it's more like
a double date. How about the four
of us go out to dinner tonight? My
treat.

RAYDELL

I don't know. I have to get to
Blinkos early in the morning so I
can--

VITO

Come on Raydell, it's a dinner. We
won't be out that late. Besides,
how often do I offer to pay?

KAYLA

He's right, Raydell. Shave your
face and find your hard shoes.
Let's just go out and have some
fun.

RAYDELL

Okay, you guys talked me into it.

VITO

Great! But I got one more problem.

RAYDELL

(taking out his
wallet)

I know, you don't get paid until
next week and you need some money
in order to treat us to dinner.

VITO

No, that's not it.

RAYDELL

Then what is it?

VITO LOOKS OVER AT KAYLA. HE'S UNCOMFORTABLE TALKING ABOUT
THE SUBJECT WHILE SHE'S IN THE ROOM.

KAYLA

(picking up on
it)

You know what. I think I'll go and
try to find something to wear for
tonight. So what time should we be
ready?

VITO

I'll be by around seven.

KAYLA

Sounds good. See you later, Vito.

VITO

See you Kayla.

KAYLA EXITS TO THE LIVING ROOM.

RAYDELL

So what's the problem?

VITO

The problem is, I want to impress
her and still be myself at the
same time. Now tell me, is that
possible?

RAYDELL

Of course it's possible. Vito, I
wish you would have a little more
confidence in yourself.

VITO

I told you Raydell, I'm nervous.
You know how smooth I can be with
the ladies, but this one is
different. I just lose all my
smoothness when I'm with her.

RAYDELL

Believe it or not, I understand.

VITO

You were the same way with Kayla?

RAYDELL

Heck no, I was too smooth for
that. Now let's work on you and
your confidence. First of all,
looks are important so you've got
to dress to impress.

VITO

Oh, you know I don't have a
problem in the clothing
department.

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

KAYLA IS MODELING A FANCY DRESS FOR TARRIN, WHO'S SITTING
AT THE TABLE PLAYING A HANDHELD GAME.

KAYLA

How does this dress look, Tarrin?

TARRIN

Maybe a little too chick for the
occasion.

KAYLA LOOKS AT HIM, SHOCKED.

KAYLA

Maybe you're right. I don't want
to upstage Vito's date.

TARRIN

Does body piercing hurt?

KAYLA

I don't know. Why would you ask me
a question like that?

TARRIN

I don't know. I guess it's a girl
thing.

KAYLA

What is that supposed to mean?

TARRIN

I hear if you want to be popular,
you have to pierce your belly
button.

KAYLA

Now where did you hear a crazy
thing like that?

TARRIN

You hear things in the streets.

TARRIN HEADS FOR THE REFRIGERATOR.

KAYLA

Anything you want to share with
me?

TARRIN

No ma'am, but thanks for asking.

KAYLA

Just so you know, body piercing
does not make you popular with
anybody.

TARRIN

Okay, I'll tell her.

KAYLA

(suspicious)

Tell Who? Is your sister planning
on piercing her navel?

TARRIN

No, her belly button-- Oops.

KAYLA

I'm going to get to the bottom of
this right now. Davonna! Come in
here please!

TARRIN TRIES TO EASE OUT THE KITCHEN.

KAYLA (cont'd)

Freeze right there mister. I want
you to stay too.

TARRIN

But I didn't do anything.

DAVONNA ENTERS THE KITCHEN.

DAVONNA

Yes mom.

KAYLA

Word on the streets is, that
someone we know plans on being
real popular soon.

DAVONNA GIVES A SUSPICIOUS GLANCE AT TARRIN.

DAVONNA

Oh yeah? So who's the lucky
person?

KAYLA

I don't really know yet, but she
thinks they can be popular by
piercing her navel. Now doesn't
that sound silly?

DAVONNA

(to Tarrin)

I gave you five dollars!

KAYLA

Maybe you should have given him
ten.

DAVONNA

Mom, he shouldn't have been
eavesdropping on my conversation
in the first place.

KAYLA

(to Tarrin)

Yes, he was wrong for doing that.

(to Davonna)

And I think you are too.

DAVONNA

But I'll be the only person who
doesn't have one.

KAYLA

Look Davonna, I know you want to
be noticed, and I know you want to
be popular, every girl wants that.
I remember growing up I had a
similar situation. All my friends
were always getting their hair
pressed. When I asked my mamma if
I could get mine pressed, she
said, "and mess up your perfectly
good hair? Then I realized, she
never pressed hers, and she had
the prettiest hair around.

RAYDELL ENTERS.

RAYDELL

Hey baby, we'd better get ready.
We don't want to make Vito late
for his date.

KAYLA

(to Davonna)

I'll finish talking to you in the
morning.

DAVONNA

Alright.

DAVONNA EXITS.

KAYLA

Alright Ray. I am ready.

RAYDELL

You're wearing that?

KAYLA

Yes. You don't like it?

RAYDELL

No... Yes, I never said I didn't
like it, but it is a little flashy
for the occasion.

KAYLA

So you're telling me I don't know
how to dress?

RAYDELL

I didn't say that.

KAYLA

Maybe I should have broken out the
ole credit card and do what I do
best!

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

TROY AND DAVONNA ARE AT THE TABLE PLAYING CHESS. TARRIN
LOOKS ON. RAYDELL AND KAYLA ENTER THE KITCHEN. KAYLA HAS
CHANGED HER OUTFIT, BUT STILL LOOKS CHIC. RAYDELL LOOKS
PRETTY SMOOTH HIMSELF.

KAYLA

So now how do I look?

DAVONNA

Wow, you are looking proper, mom.

KAYLA

First I'm too flashy, now I'm too
proper. I wish you guys would make
up your minds.

TROY

No, proper means, just right.

KAYLA

Oh. Thank you.

RAYDELL DISPLAYS HIS ATTIRE.

RAYDELL

I hope you're taking notes, kids.
Remember the clothes don't make
you, you make the clothes.
Whenever you're out in public,
always try to look your best.

VITO ENTERS THROUGH THE BACK DOOR DRESSED IN A BRIGHT
LAVENDER SUIT AND DARK SUNGLASSES.

VITO

Hey guys.

RAYDELL

(to kids)

...But don't try too hard.

VITO WALKS UP TO THE TABLE.

VITO

(to Troy and
Davonna)

Hey! You guys ready?

DAVONNA AND TROY LOOK CONFUSED.

TROY

For what?

KAYLA

Vito, we're over here.

VITO IS STARTLED. HE BEGINS LOOKING AROUND.

VITO

Who said that?

RAYDELL

Vito, why don't you take off the
sunglasses, it's night time.

VITO

(takes off the
glasses)

How did you guys get over there?

RAYDELL

I hope you don't plan on driving
with those glasses on?

VITO

Oh yeah, about using your car...

RAYDELL

No problem, I'll drive.

KAYLA

Where's your date?

VITO

She wasn't ready when I called
her, we'll pick her up on the way.

RAYDELL

Wow, that lavender suit really...
kicks.

VITO

I know. This is my lucky suit.

TROY

(under his
breath)

You're gonna need it.

RAYDELL

Alright, we ready to go now?

VITO

I don't know Rob. I'm really
nervous.

VITO SHAKES HIS HANDS, SENDING LARGE AMOUNTS OF SWEAT
FLYING. SOME LAND ON THE KIDS, THEY REACT AND AD-LIB WITH
DISGUST.

VITO (cont'd)

Sorry about that, kids.

VITO TAKES OUT A HANDKERCHIEF AND DRIES HIS HANDS. THE KIDS
GRAB NAPKINS OFF OF THE TABLE AND BEGIN DRYING THEMSELVES
OFF TOO.

DAVONNA

Game over.

TROY

Then I win.

DAVONNA

What do you mean you win?

TROY

You just quit, that's a forfeit.

DAVONNA

I quit because there's
perspiration all over the place.

VITO

Correction. Women perspire, men
sweat.

KAYLA

Everybody go wash up, right now.

THE KIDS GET UP FROM THE TABLE.

TARRIN

I'll be glad to take a bath
tonight.

KAYLA

Are you alright, Vito?

VITO

Yeah, I'm really sorry about that.
My hands always sweat when I get
nervous. I can't control it.

RAYDELL

That's alright, now I know how to
get Tarrin to take a bath.

KAYLA

We'd better go, I hate being
late. Tarrin, Davonna, I want you
two in bed by nine o'clock, and
don't forget to take a bath.

RAYDELL

Troy hold everything down while
we're gone. And don't leave the
house

TROY

Yes I know the rules.

RAYDELL

I know you know them. I just want
you to follow them.

VITO

Can we leave now. My shoes are
getting tight.

INT. RAYDELL'S CAR - MOVING - NIGHT (N1)

RAYDELL IS DRIVING. KAYLA SITS BETWEEN HIM AND VITO.

VITO

Your car is kind of small, but it
rides pretty good.

RAYDELL

(insincere)

Thanks Vito. So why'd think it was
necessary to bring that harp of
yours?

VITO

I might just serenade Laweena
tonight. Women love that stuff.

SFX: HARP STRUM

RAYDELL

You know what? I guess this could
also be a celebration dinner for
Kayla?

VITO

Why? What happened?

KAYLA

I start my new security job next
week. At a jewelry store downtown.

VITO

That's great. So you giving up on
your candle business?

KAYLA

Oh no, the security job is only
going to be part time, you know,
until Raydell gets that movie
roll.

VITO

What movie roll? I didn't know you
acted.

RAYDELL

Yeah, I'm just working at Blinkos
until I get that call.

VITO

What call?

RAYDELL

Well I auditioned for Dark Thunder
a little while ago.

VITO

Oh, a weather forecaster?

RAYDELL

No man. He's a superhero. You've
never heard of Dark Thunder
before?

VITO

No.

RAYDELL

Just look it up on the internet,
you'll see.

KAYLA

So gentlemen, where are we going
tonight, anyway?

VITO

It's a new restaurant across town
called The Luscious Lamb. I ate
there last night just to make sure
it was proper.

KAYLA

(proud to know
the meaning)

Oh you mean, just right, right?

VITO

(looking at her
strange)

...Right.

RAYDELL

The Luscious Lamb? Isn't that on
Lexington next to the Latino
Laundromat?

VITO

No, you're talking about The House
Of Ham. That used to be on
Hunnington.

RAYDELL

That's right. But what do you
mean, used to be?

VITO

They moved, now they're in the
Barrio by The Big Beef Broiler.

RAYDELL

I thought The Big Beef Broiler
went bankrupt.

KAYLA IS OBVIOUSLY GETTING FED UP.

VITO

Bankrupt? Where did you hear that?

RAYDELL

From Crooked Teeth Carl.

VITO

I thought Crooked Teeth Carl was
incarcerated.

RAYDELL

No, you're talking about Snagged
Tooth Sam. He and his brother
Dingy Donald--

KAYLA

(interrupting)

You two are going to be toothless
twins if I hear another syllable
out of you.

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

THE KIDS ARE RUMMAGING THROUGH THE CUPBOARDS AND
REFRIGERATOR.

TROY

Alright you two. Stay out of
trouble. I'm going to my room to
watch TV.

TARRIN

Me too.

TROY HEADS UPSTAIRS, TARRIN TRIES TO FOLLOW.

DAVONNA

Wait a minute you. Where do you
think you're going?

TARRIN FREEZES.

DAVONNA (cont'd)

I paid you good money not to say
anything. I don't believe you took
my money and broke your promise.
Give it back.

TARRIN

I don't have it.

DAVONNA

What do you mean you don't have
it?!

TARRIN

I put it in my piggy bank. The
only way to get it out is to break
it.

DAVONNA

Looks like I'll just have to find
another way for you to pay me
back.

TARRIN

What other way is there?

AN IDEA FLASHES IN DAVONNA MIND. THERE'S A DIABOLICAL LOOK
ON HER FACE.

DAVONNA

Don't worry, I'll think of
something.

INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

RAYDELL, KAYLA, VITO AND LAWEENA ENTER THE RESTAURANT.

SFX: AMBIENT RESTAURANT NOISE AND CHATTER:

LAWEENA IS AN ATTRACTIVE YOUNG LADY, SHE HAS HER HAIR AND
NAILS DONE.

RAYDELL

The place looks nice.

KAYLA

Yeah, but I think they went a
little heavy on the lamb theme:
Lamb paintings. Lamb statues. Lamb
skin chairs?

VITO

Classy, right? Let's sit down.

THEY SIT AT A TABLE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RESTAURANT.

KAYLA

I love your dress.

LAWEENA

Thanks, I love yours too.

KAYLA

So how did you two meet?

VITO

(puts his hands
on Laweena's)

We met at a carnival last week,
next to the cotton candy and the
magician.

LAWEENA

right away I knew there was sweet
magic between us.

VITO

I spent sixty-five dollars trying
to win her this big stuffed
animal.

LAWEENA BEINGS DRYING HER HANDS OFF WITH A NAPKIN.

LAWEENA

He didn't win the stuffed animal,
he won my heart instead.

VITO IS A LITTLE EMBARRASSED. HE DRIES HIS HANDS OFF IN HIS
NAPKIN TOO.

KAYLA

That is so romantic.

LAWEENA

I've never really met anyone like
Vito before. He's kind, cute and
lovable, and on top of that, he
has a great sense of humor.

VITO PUTS HIS ARM AROUND LAWEENA.

VITO

I feel the same about you.

(to Raydell and
Kayla)

Don't you think we make a great
couple?

KAYLA

You sure do. I'm real happy for
both of you.

RAYDELL

So am I.

VITO

Thanks Rob, Kayla. That means a
lot to me. Let's order.

THEY ALL BEGIN LOOKING THROUGH THEIR MENUS TRYING TO FIND
SOMETHING THEY LIKE.

LAWEENA

I sure am hungry. It's a nice
place, but the service seems a
little slow.

VITO

That's how it is at all these
classy places. They take their
time to make sure they get it
right for you. Now everybody can
order what they like, but I hear
the Finger lickin' lamb legs are
to die for.

RAYDELL

I might try that.

LAWEENA

(Eyes Wendel on
the-sly)

This looks good too. Snow peas and
Sea Bass.

MUSIC CUE:

VITO STANDS UP AND STARTS SINGING AND DANCING. MOVING ABOUT
THE ROOM PUTTING ON A SHOW.

MUSIC PLAYS

VITO

(singing)

"You are my. My my my my my my my
only lady. My my my my my my my
only love...

THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM ARE PUZZLED AS THEY WATCH HIM
PERFORM. RAYDELL AND KAYLA DON'T KNOW WHAT TO MAKE OF IT.

KAYLA

(whispering to
Raydell)

What is he doing?

RAYDELL

I think it's the Camel-Walk.

VITO

(still singing)

You are my. My my my my my my my
heart, my soul, my heart, my soul,
my lady, my love. You are my. My
my my my my my my..."

LAWEENA IS LAUGHING HER HEAD OFF, BUT HER LAUGH IS
DEFINITELY NOT CUTE. IT'S SOMEWHAT IRRITATING. LAWEENA
FINALLY CLAPS HER HANDS TWICE.

MUSIC CUE: OUT

VITO IS BACK TO NORMAL. HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT JUST TOOK
PLACE.

VITO (cont'd)

(to himself)

What am I doing over here?

RAYDELL

(loud whisper)

Vito. Over here.

VITO WALKS BACK OVER TO THE TABLE AND SITS DOWN.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

(to Vito)

What was that all singing and
dancing about?

VITO

(raspy voice)

What singing? Do they have dinner
shows here?

LAWEENA

Isn't he just adorable?

RAYDELL

(sarcasm)

Oh yeah, simply adorable.

(whispers to
Vito)

I think you're trying too hard to
impress her.

VITO

(whispering)

What do you mean?

RAYDELL

What do you think I mean? What's
with the--

THE WAITRESS FINALLY COMES TO TAKE THEIR ORDERS.

WAITRESS

Good evening. My name is Gena. I
will be your waitress for this
evening. Are you ready to order?

KAYLA

Yes. I'll have the spinach lasagna
with lamb sauce.

LAWEENA

I'll have the Bah-bah-bar-B-Q lamb
chop dinner.

RAYDELL

I'll try the finger lickin' lamb
leg combo.

WAITRESS

Good choice.

VITO WINKS AT RAYDELL.

VITO

I guess I'll go with the usual. A
Ceasar salad and a brand muffin.

RAYDELL GIVES VITO A LOOK AS IF TO SAY, "REMEMBER WHAT I
TOLD YOU." VITO PICKS UP ON IT.

VITO (cont'd)

You know what? Cancel that. I'll
have the lamb tails, mashed
potatoes, one order of hot wings,
corn on the cob, red beans and
rice and a slice of hot-water
cornbread.

THE WAITRESS SHAKES HER HAND IS IF IT'S GETTING TIRED FROM
ALL THE WRITING.

WAITRESS

(sarcasm)

Would you like anything else with
that?

VITO

Yeah, a side of okra, and can I
get some sheep dip?

WAITRESS

Hot or mild, sir?

VITO

Hot, of course.

WAITRESS

Thank you. I'll be back with your
order shortly--

THE WAITRESS BEGINS TO LEAVE, BUT LAWEENA STOPS HER.

LAWEENA

Wait a minute, Gena. I changed my
mind.

LAWEENA GLANCES AT VITO AGAIN.

LAWEENA (cont'd)

What is the catch of the day?

WAITRESS

The catch of the day is Red
Snapper.

MUSIC PLAYS:

ONCE AGAIN, VITO GOES INTO HIS PERFORMANCE. HE MAKES
LAWEENA THE SUBJECT BY SINGING TO HER.

VITO

"Please please please don't leave
me this way. Because you. You've
got that magic in your smile, that
special glow in your eyes. Oh baby
you. You don't have to leave me,
no no. You don't have to leave me
like this..."

KAYLA

(to Raydell)

The man's got two left feet and
one wrong woman.

INT. RAYDELL'S CAR - MOVING - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

RAYDELL, KAYLA AND VITO DRIVE HOME.

VITO

Thanks for all the tips and advise
you gave me. I had a lot of fun
tonight. Everything went as smooth
as silk.

RAYDELL AND KAYLA GIVE EACH OTHER A CONCERNED LOOK.

RAYDELL

You think everything went well?

VITO

Yes, didn't you?

KAYLA

No,

(suspicious)

but you never did tell us what
Laweena did for a living.

VITO

She's a nurse, downtown.

RAYDELL AND KAYLA SEEM TO BE AT EASE.

VITO (cont'd)

And in her spare time, she's
practicing to be a hypnotist.

KAYLA

(concerned)

Oh no.

VITO

What?

RAYDELL

I hate to say it Vito, but I think
she hypnotized you.

VITO

She tried to hypnotize me the
other day, but it didn't work. To
tell you the truth, she's not too
good at it. But she's a heck of a
nurse.

KAYLA

Vito, I think you're still
hypnotized.

VITO

What do you mean, still? I told
you, she tried, but she still has
a lot to learn.

RAYDELL

Then why is it that every time
someone mentioned a type of fish,
you started singing? Loudly.

VITO

What are you talking about?

RAYDELL

You just got through singing
Purple Rain.

VITO

Yeah right.

RAYDELL GIVES VITO A SINCERE LOOK.

VITO (cont'd)

How'd I sound?

RAYDELL

Look, I hate to say it, but your
girlfriend, Laweena had you
looking pretty silly at the
restaurant.

VITO SEEMS TO BE A LITTLE BOTHERED BY THIS.

VITO

In front of everybody?

KAYLA

I'm afraid so.

VITO LOOKS UPSET, BUT SOON BURST OUT LAUGHING

VITO

That ole crazy girl! She got me! I
should have known there was
something fishy going on when she
kept asking me out for karaoke.

KAYLA

You mean you're not mad at her?

VITO

Na, I love practical jokes. As a
matter of fact, she's probably
just getting back at me for the
joke I played on her a couple of
days ago.

RAYDELL

What did you do?

VITO

I put this big rubber snake in her
bath tub. When she saw that... Man
she tore up everything in that
place trying to get out of there.
Now I have to help her remodel the
whole bathroom.

EVERYONE LAUGHS.

KAYLA

Well I'm glad there's no hard
feelings.

VITO

No, that's my baby. This could be
the one, you guys. I always said,
the woman I married had to have a
good sense of humor.

RAYDELL

Married? Wait a minute now Vito,
you're not thinking about--

VITO

No no. I'm just saying, Laweena's
a good candidate. We're not
rushing into anything. We're just
going to take our time and see
what happens.

KAYLA

I think that's a wise decision. I
just hope she doesn't have you do
anything really crazy.

VITO

Don't worry, I've known her for a
whole week. She's not like that.

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

KAYLA

We're back!

DAVONNA ENTERS.

DAVONNA

Hey, aren't you guys back a little
early?

KAYLA

Yeah, we kind of got kicked out
the restaurant.

DAVONNA

Why? What happened?

KAYLA

Nothing. But you and I still need
to finish talking.

RAYDELL

Vito, why don't we go an get some
dessert in the kitchen.

VITO

Yeah, sorry I ran out of money.

RAYDELL AND VITO EXIT TO THE KITCHEN.

KAYLA

So Davonna. This belly piercing
thing is not the smartest--

DAVONNA

Mom. I don't see what the big deal
is. I already have my ears
pierced. I mean it's not like I'm
getting a tattoo or shaving my
head.

KAYLA

The big deal is, you need to focus
on your school work and not your
school popularity. Look, you're
getting old enough to make your
own decisions now, but I want you
to think before you act. Remember,
fads come and fads go, but once
this fad is gone, you're stuck...
like a pin cushion.

THEY LAUGH.

DAVONNA

You're right mom. When you really
think about it, it's not that
important. Maybe that psychic hot
line wasn't such a good idea after
all.

KAYLA

Psychic hot line? Honey, that's
only for entertainment.

DAVONNA

Yeah, but all of my friends--

RAYDELL ENTERS FROM THE KITCHEN READING THE MAIL. VITO
TRAILS IN.

RAYDELL

(to Kayla)

Hey, why is our phone bill three
hundred dollars?!

DAVONNA LOOKS AS THOUGH SHE REALLY DIDN'T CALCULATE THE
COST OF ALL THOSE PHONE CALLS.

KAYLA

I just found out our daughter has
been calling the psychic hot line.

DAVONNA

I'm sorry dad. I've learned my
lesson and I'll never do it again.

RAYDELL

(unemotional)

Alright.

DAVONNA LOOKS SURPRISED AND RELIEVED.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

We'll start automatic deduction
out of your allowance starting
next week.

DAVONNA

But dad, that'll take forever.

RAYDELL

The psychics should have told you
that.

SFX: COW BELLS

KAYLA

What's that sound?

VITO

I hear it too.

RAYDELL

Yeah. Sounds like Kool and the
Gang.

TARRIN ENTERS WEARING OVER-SIZED RUBBER EARS AND A COW BELL
AROUND HIS NECK.

KAYLA

Tarrin, what's with the cow bell
and big rubber ears?

TARRIN

Davonna says I have to wear this.

KAYLA

Why would she make you do
something like that?

TARRIN

She says she needs to know where I
am at all times. So I won't easy
drop on her. Whatever that means.

RAYDELL

Your mom told me what happened
between you and Davonna. You were
wrong for listening in on her
conversation, so I guess you have
to pay the price.

DAVONNA

Finally. Somebody on my side.

KAYLA

Raydell, you mean to tell me that
you're going to let your son walk
around looking like that?

RAYDELL

That's right. Sometimes we need to
let our kids handle their own
problems their own way.

(to Tarrin)

Just don't go outside like that.

VITO

I think he looks pretty cool. Kind
of like a giant rat in clothes.

KAYLA WALKS TO THE REFRIGERATOR.

KAYLA

Stop teasing my kid, Vito.

VITO

They know I'm just playing with
them.

KAYLA

How about a late night snack,
kids?

TARRIN

Sounds good to me!

DAVONNA

Me too.

KAYLA

Have a seat, I'll get it.

TARRIN SIT DOWN AT THE TABLE. KAYLA TAKES A PATE OF READY
MADE SANDWICHES OUT OF THE REFRIGERATOR.

VITO

Hey Tarrin, you still having those
weird dreams?

TARRIN

Yeah. Last night I dreamed I was
playing basketball with some long
headed aliens.

VITO

Yeah? Well they probably said the
same thing about you.

VITO BURSTS OUT LAUGHING. KAYLA SNEERS AT VITO AS SHE
BRINGS THE SANDWICHES TO THE TABLE.

KAYLA

(to Tarrin)

Hey, how would you kids like to
see a late night show?

TARRIN

Yes ma'am!

DAVONNA

As long as we don't have to pay.

KAYLA

No, you don't have to pay
anything, but somebody's gotta pay
something. Here your snack. I made
your favorite.

TARRIN

Tuna fish sandwich!

RAYDELL

It's show time!

KAYLA, RAYDELL, TARRIN AND DAVONNA WATCH VITO SING AND
DANCE.

VITO

"Please please please don't leave
me this way. Because you. You've
got that magic in your smile, that
special glow in your eyes. Oh baby
you. You don't have to leave me,
no no. You don't have to leave me
like this..."

EVERYBODY LAUGHS.

FADE OUT.

END OF SHOW