Home of the Braves

This is a comedy about a blacklisted Hollywood directortrying to film her first family TV show on an extremelysmall budget. Starring: Kimberly Coburn - as Kayla Brave. Kenneth Byrd - as Raydell Brave. Djarese Blevins - as Troy Brave. Mary Jenkins - as Davonna Brave. Amir Byrd - as Tarrin Brave. Teresa Suarez Grosso - Felicia - the Director. Anthony De La Cruz - Greco, the Cinematographer. SOUND FX & SAMPLES PROVIDED BY: * FREE SOUND.ORG * PRO MUSIC PACK.COM * LOOPERMAN.COM * GLITCHMACHINES.COM * SOUND EFFECT PACK.COM * LOOPMASTERS.COM * ZAPSPLAT.COM. MUSIC PROVIDED BY: * PROMUSICPACK.COM * LOOPERMAN.COM. Our Website is: https://www.skitz-o-phonics.com/

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Home of the Braves

Achin' for bacon (S1 E3)

December 09, 2020 • eArL Hamilton • Season 1 • Episode 3

Dad (Raydell) buys bargain-meat from a stranger in a van.

Cast:

Kim Coburn (Kayla Brave)
Kenneth Byrd (Raydell Brave)
Teresa Suárez Grosso (Felicia De La Puente)
Mary Jenkins (Davonna Brave)
Djarese Blevins (Troy Brave)
Amir Byrd (Tarin Brave)
Anthony De La Cruz (Grecko)
Jessica Bryant (Nurse)
Lorenzo Rodriguez (Game Show Host - Tony Patterson)

This is the post roll (outro) for each episode.

Support the show

Be sure to check out our website at https://www.skitz-o-phonics.com/homeofthebraves, which includes pics and credits, plus more entertaining content!
(R.I.P. Ken)

FADE IN:

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - DAY (DAY 1)

CAST AND CREW ARE GATHERED. ALMOST READY TO RECORD.

FELICIA

Alright Greco, light it--

KAYLA

Wait!

FELICIA

(upset/mumbling
under her breath)

Like mother like daughter, huh?

(out loud)

What is it now Kay-Kay?

KAYLA

So is the video working this time?

GRECO

No. I couldn't get it fixed.

KAYLA

So it's still just audio?

GRECO

Yes ma'am.

KAYLA

So why did we just spend the last
four days rehearsing? Blocking? I
mean, why can't we just stand in
front of the microphone and read
the lines if we're just recording
audio?

GRECO

Well we still need the sound
effects. You know, like the door
bell. Doors opening and closing.
That kind of stuff.

DAVONNA

Can't you just add that in post
production?

GRECO

We don't really have the equipment
or sound effects for... post
production or whatever you call
it.

DAVONNA

Is the first episode up on the
website, or have you podcast it
yet?

FELICIA

Not yet. I want to get at least
three shows completely recorded
before we tell the world we have a
series.

TROY

So when do we get paid?

FELICIA

On the back-end, how many times do
I have to say it?

TARRIN

I still say we need a binding
contract.

GRECO

I'll draw some up for you tonight
and get them to you by the next
recording.

TARRIN

Great.

FELICIA

(annoyed)

So, is everybody ready now? Any
more gripes, grievances or
frivolous concerns?

NO RESPONSE.

FELICIA (cont'd)

Good. Alright places!

(beat)

Greco, light it up!

GRECO

Home of the Braves. "Achin' for
bacon".

SFX: CLAP BOARD

FELICIA

And... action.

THEME MUSIC PLAYS

-----------------------------------------------------------

FADE IN:

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - DAY (DAY 1)

RAYDELL IS AT THE STOVE COOKING BREAKFAST WHEN KAYLA WALKS
IN.

RAYDELL

Good morning, Honey. Get your
chompers ready, breakfast is
almost done.

KAYLA

Is that what that awful smell is?

RAYDELL

I may have over-cooked the bacon a
little, but it's still good.

KAYLA NOTICES THE CHEAP-LOOKING PACKAGE LAYING ON THE
COUNTER.

KAYLA

Since when did the grocery store
start wrapping their meat in
newspaper?

RAYDELL

I didn't get it at our usual
grocery store.

KAYLA

So where'd you get it?

RAYDELL

What difference does it make?
Let's just sit down and enjoy it.

KAYLA

Ray, it looks like a hobo wrapped
it. Now where did you get it?

RAYDELL

Okay, okay, I'll tell you. On my
way home, this guy pulls up beside
me in a van and ask me if I wanted
a sweet deal on some meat--

KAYLA

No, no, no! Tell me you didn't.
Please say "April Fools,"
"Gotcha," or "You had me going,"
or something, but don't tell me
you spent our hard earned money on
road kill!

RAYDELL

It's not road kill. The guy's a
professional hunter, his brother's
a butcher and their uncle Jake
owns refrigerated vans. It's a
family owned business, Kayla. I
mean what else do you want, a USDA
stamp of approval?

KAYLA

Yes. Yes I do. That would be much
more valid than this B. F.
Goodrich stamp.

RAYDELL

(embarrassed)

Oh that. That just means it's pre
tenderized. And look, the more you
cook it, the more it fades.

KAYLA

You really shouldn't eat that,
Ray. It's not the cleanest looking
meat I ever saw.

RAYDELL

If there was any kind of living
germ in there, believe me, I
killed it in the cooking process.
Maybe that's what you were
smelling, burnt germs.

KAYLA

Just make sure you don't mix your
contaminated bacon with my real
bacon.

RAYDELL

I keep telling you, there's
nothing wrong with it.

RAYDELL SITS DOWN AT THE TABLE AND BEGINS TO EAT.

TROY ENTERS HALF-DRESSED AND IN A HURRY.

TROY

Hey mom, did you-- What stinks?

RAYDELL

(offended)

Maybe it's you.

KAYLA

What is it you need, Troy?

TROY

I can't find any clean clothes.

KAYLA

Check the dryer.

RAYDELL

(to Kayla)

Hey, this bacon is pretty darn
good. Not like that processed
stuff you find in the store. Come
on Kay, don't you at least want to
taste it?

KAYLA

No. And do not, I repeat, do not
give my kids any of that mangled
meat you brought home.

RAYDELL

Okay, fine. I'll eat it all by
myself, Miss "I'm afraid of fresh
meat."

(takes a bite)

Owe!

RAYDELL HOLDS HIS MOUTH IN PAIN.

KAYLA

(teasing)

What'd you do, bite down on a
rock?

RAYDELL

Felt more like a bone.

RAYDELL TAKES IT OUT HIS MOUTH WITH HIS FINGERS.

RAYDELL

We're both wrong. Part of a hoof.

RAYDELL CONTINUES EATING.

DAVONNA ENTERS.

DAVONNA

What's that smell?

RAYDELL

(offended)

Maybe it's you.

KAYLA

Stay away from your father's
bacon. No matter what he tells
you, do not eat it. You hear me?

DAVONNA

Yes ma'am. Oh yeah, my lunch money
is missing again. It's the third
time this month.

TARRIN

I'm missing some money too.

KAYLA

I don't have time to talk about it
right now, you're late. Here,

(grabbing some
fruit)

eat some fruit for breakfast.

KAYLA HANDS FRUIT TO DAVONNA AND TARRIN.

TARRIN

What about my lunch money?

KAYLA

I'm sorry, but I can't reach into
my magic purse and just pull out
magic money every time you guys
lose it. Now go.

DAVONNA AND TARRIN EXIT OUT THE HOUSE.

KAYLA (cont'd)

Hurry up Troy.

(handing him a
banana)

Here you go.

TROY

What's this?

KAYLA

It's called a banana, it's good
for you.

TROY

Since when?

KAYLA

I bet it taste better going in
your mouth than it does up your
nose.

TROY

Okay, I'll eat it.

KAYLA

Here.

TROY REACHES FOR THE BANANA...

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

KAYLA (cont'd)

Owe! You shocked me.

TROY

I think we ran out of that static
guard stuff in the dryer.

KAYLA

Well be careful, I don't want you
going around shocking people all
day.

TROY

(devilish)

Yes, that would be awful.

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - DAY (DAY 1)

RAYDELL STANDS BEFORE THE ENTIRE FAMILY. HE'S HUFFING AND
SWEATING FOR NO APPARENT REASON.

RAYDELL

This family is faced with a
serious problem--

KAYLA

Speaking of faces, yours don't
look too good.

RAYDELL

I'm fine, but I wish somebody
would stop tinkering with the
heater!

RAYDELL WIPES THE SWEAT FROM HIS BROW AS THE REST OF THE
FAMILY LOOKS ON, CONFUSED AND CONCERNED.

RAYDELL

Now, as I was saying, over the
past few days we've all had one
thing in common, missing money.
That can only mean two things,
either there's a cat burglar on
the loose, or someone among us is
a thief.

MYSTERY MUSIC

EVERYONE LOOKS AT EACH OTHER VERY SUSPICIOUSLY.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

In case you didn't realize, that
was an invitation for whoever
might have committed the crime to
come clean right now and save
yourself a lot of time, trouble
and embarrassment.

AGAIN EVERYONE LOOKS AT EACH OTHER SUSPICIOUSLY, BUT NO ONE
TAKES THE INVITATION.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

Okay, fine. Maybe there is a cat
burglar on the loose. But I'm
missing five dollars and fifty-two
cents, and believe me, I intend on
getting every penny back, with
interest. Who else is missing
money?

KAYLA

I'm missing eight dollars.

RAYDELL

Tarrin?

TARRIN

Two dollars.

DAVONNA

I'm missing three dollars.

KAYLA

And what about you Troy, how much
are you missing?

TROY

Actually, nothing.

DAVONNA

You mean everybody's been robbed
except Troy?

EVERYBODY SUSPICIOUSLY STARES AT TROY.

RAYDELL

Something stinks to high heaven.

TROY

Maybe the cat burglar likes me.

INT. DAVONNA'S BEDROOM - DAY (DAY 1)

DAVONNA SITS AT HER COMPUTER WHILE SHE TALKS TO TROY.

DAVONNA

(whispering)

Why don't you just come clean and
tell us what you did with the
money.

TROY

(whispering)

What money? I didn't take
anybody's money!

TROY SHUFFLES HIS FEET ON THE CARPET.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

TARRIN (O.S.)

Ow!

TROY

(whispering)

You guys think I did it because I
have a history of violence,
dishonesty and verbal abuse, but
that's no reason to pin this on
me.

DAVONNA

Actually those are all pretty good
reasons.

TROY

I get no trial, no council, but
yet everybody's already convicted
me!

DAVONNA

If there is an actual cat burglar
out there, explain how they hit
everyone but you?

TROY

I don't know. I can't explain it.
That's the problem.

TROY SHUFFLES HIS FEET ON THE CARPET AGAIN.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

TARRIN (O.S.)

Ow!

NOW WE SEE THAT TROY HAS TARRIN PINNED TO THE FLOOR AS HE
STATIC SHOCKS HIM WITH HIS FINGER.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

TARRIN

Ow! What did I do?

RAYDELL AND KAYLA WALK IN. RAYDELL LOOKS WEAK, PALE AND
DRENCHED IN SWEAT.

KAYLA

Troy, let your brother up and stop
static shocking him.

TROY

I never get to have any fun.

TROY RELEASES TARRIN.

RAYDELL

Hey, anybody else feel that
earthquake?

DAVONNA

You sure you're okay, Daddy?

RAYDELL

Yes... and no... mostly no.

KAYLA

You know the longer you hold out,
the longer your punishment's going
to be, Troy.

TROY

But I'm innocent.

RAYDELL

That's what they all say. Let us
know when you're ready to plea
bargain, son.

RAYDELL PUTS A FRIENDLY HAND ON TROY'S SHOULDER.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

RAYDELL

Ow!

KAYLA

Let me guess, now your spleen is
aching.

RAYDELL

(relieved)

No, when I put my hand on Troy's
shoulder, he shocked me.

(smiles)

But I actually feel a little
better. Hit me again, Troy.

TROY SHUFFLES HIS FEET ON THE RUG THEN TOUCHES RAYDELL WITH
HIS FINGER.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

RAYDELL

Ow!

(relieved)

Ahhh. See, Kayla, you were wrong,
he is good for something.

INT. RAYDELL'S BEDROOM - NIGHT (NIGHT 1)

KAYLA IS SPRAYING AIR FRESHENER WHILE RAYDELL LAYS ACROSS
THE BED MOANING AND SWEATING.

KAYLA

I'm ready to go to bed, but I'm
afraid to go to sleep.

RAYDELL

What are you afraid of?

KAYLA

You look worse than a homeless
vampire.

RAYDELL GROANS IN PAIN.

KAYLA (cont'd)

What's wrong?

RAYDELL

It feels like there's a giant tape
worm eating away at my insides.

KAYLA

Maybe you need another shock
treatment.

RAYDELL

No, I think think that just makes
him madder.

KAYLA CLIMBS INTO BED.

RAYDELL (O.S.)

Maybe I'm just over-reacting. I'm
probably just having some kind of
allergic reaction to--

KAYLA

Infectious germs? Bacteria?
Botulism? I told you not to eat
that toxic meat, didn't I?

RAYDELL

Yes, I know, but it was five
dollars for twenty pounds. Who
wouldn't jump at that?

KAYLA

You should have known it was too
good to be true, but you never
listen to me, you just act like I
don't even exist. Time after time-

RAYDELL

Help me now, nag me later. I need
some kind of relief here, Kayla.

SFX: FARTING

KAYLA

Then why don't you stop farting
and let me take you to the
hospital?

KAYLA SPRAYS MORE AIR FRESHENER.

RAYDELL

No. No hospitals.

KAYLA

There's nothing to be afraid of.

RAYDELL

Afraid? Who said anything about
being afraid? I just don't like
needles, the probing, all those
bedpans.

KAYLA

Well what are you going to do,
moan, groan and fart all night?

RAYDELL

(groaning)

Don't we have some baking soda or
cyanide capsules? Anything to take
away this burning pain?

KAYLA

All we've got is aspirin and
castor oil.

RAYDELL

Yuck. Maybe I'll just jump off a
bridge.

INT. BRAVE'S KITCHEN - DAY (DAY 2)

KAYLA IS FIXING BREAKFAST.

KAYLA

Breakfast is ready!

THE KIDS ENTER.

TROY

May I ask, exactly how long I'm
grounded for?

KAYLA

For as long as you continue to
withhold the truth.

TROY

But I am telling you the truth.

KAYLA

(holding hand up)

Tell it to the hand.

TARRIN

(holding hand up)

Yeah, tell it to the hand.

TROY

You shut up.

SFX: STATIC SHOCK

TARRIN (O.S.)

Ow! Mom, he shocked me again!

KAYLA

Okay, go change your filthy
clothes, Troy.

TROY

But it's Saturday.

KAYLA

I don't care. You've used your
static powers for the last time.

TROY HEADS FOR THE BEDROOM BUT STOPS WHEN HE NOTICES
RAYDELL STAGGERING IN, DRESSED IN HIS ROBE.

TROY

(concerned)

Morning dad.

RAYDELL

(to Troy)

Hey Davonna. Gettin' taller
everyday.

TROY

I'm Troy.

KAYLA

So how do you feel now, Ray?

RAYDELL

For some reason, I wasn't able to
sleep it off.

DAVONNA

Dad, I really think you should go
to the doctor. Just let 'em check
you out.

RAYDELL

Trust me, Troy, I'm okay. It just
takes time.

RAYDELL STAGGERS ACROSS THE ROOM.

KAYLA

Okay? Ray you can't even recognize
your own kids, and look at you,
your staggering all over the place
like some kind of Hollywood drunk.

RAYDELL

It's these new house shoes. I just
gotta break 'em in.

KAYLA

You're barefooted, Ray. Did you at
least throw that bacon away?

RAYDELL

Yes Honey. I told Troy to put it
outside in the trash can last
night.

KAYLA

Thank God. Now that those
microcritters are gone, I can
start disinfecting the kitchen.

DAVONNA LOOKS OUT THE WINDOW.

DAVONNA

Hey what's that outside?

KAYLA

I don't know.

TROY

Let's go look.

EXT. BRAVE'S BACK YARD - DAY (DAY 2)

THE FAMILY EXITS OUTSIDE.

SFX: SLIDING DOOR

NOW THEY'RE LOOKING AT ALL THE DEAD CAT CARCASSES LAYING IN
THEIR YARD.

TARRIN

Ewww, gross.

DAVONNA

There must be a dozen dead cats
out here.

TROY

What a Catastrophe. Get it? Cat
astrophe?

KAYLA

What do you think happened?

RAYDELL

Maybe that cat burglar decided to
become a serial killer.

DAVONNA

Or maybe those cats got into the
meat you guys threw out last
night.

KAYLA

Okay, that's it. You are going to
the hospital.

TROY

I agree with mom. Nothing's more
important than your health. And my
allowance.

RAYDELL

I told you guys I don't want to be
around all those sick people.

KAYLA

Ray, there's sixteen dead cats
laying in our back yard, you could
be next.

RAYDELL

For the last time, I feel
perfectly fine, Tarrin--

SFX: WHACK

RAYDELL FALLS TO THE GROUND. NOW WE SEE TROY HOLDING A
STIFF DEAD CAT BY THE LEGS.

TROY

Man, these cats are hard as rocks.

KAYLA

Put him in the car boys.

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - DAY (DAY 2)

RAYDELL DOESN'T LOOK TOO GOOD. HE LAYS IN BED UNCONSCIOUS
WITH HIS HEAD BANDAGED AND AN I.V. ATTACHED TO HIS ARM.

TROY

You think I hit him too hard?

KAYLA

No. That turban he's wearing just
means he's changed religions.

DAVONNA

Thanks to you, daddy probably has
a concussion.

TROY

It was for his own good. He
looked horribly sick, like he was
about to die or somethin'.

KAYLA

And now what does he look like,
Mr. America?

TARRIN

You think he's gonna die?

KAYLA

Of course he's not going to make
die. Your father's a big strong
man, he just needs some rest,
medicine and a good enema.

TROY

If he dies, am I still grounded?

KAYLA

Yes.

TARRIN LOOKS NERVOUS.

RAYDELL'S CELL PHONE RINGS.

DAVONNA

Should we answer dad's phone?

KAYLA

I'll get it.

KAYLA ANSWERS IT.

KAYLA (cont'd)

Hello?... Hello?... I know it's
you, Galacia so stop trippin'...
No, you may not speak to him, he's
in a coma right now!... No, he's
not going to die, but you will if
you keep calling this phone!

KAYLA HANGS UP THE PHONE.

DAVONNA

Why does she keep calling Dad?

KAYLA

The crazy lady claims she's still
in love with your father, but I
think she's just trying to piss me
off.

TROY

I think she's doing a good job of
that.

TARRIN

I have something I need to tell
you guys.

KAYLA

Can't it wait Tarrin? Now is not
exactly the time for anything
except prayers. I'll be right
back. I gotta go pee. And don't
play with that remote control bed.

KAYLA RUSHES OUT OF THE ROOM.

TROY

(devilish)

The bed has a remote?

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - MOMENTS LATER (DAY 2)

KAYLA ENTERS THE ROOM TO FIND TROY PLAYING WITH RAYDELL'S
MOTORIZED BED.

KAYLA

What are you doing? Didn't I tell
you not to play with that bed? Get
off of it.

TROY CLIMBS OFF OF THE BED.

TROY

By the way mom, we were talking to
dad and he said--

KAYLA

He spoke?

TROY

Yes he did, he said that he really
hasn't been the father he should
have been, so he told us to tell
you to buy us new laptops. Then he
slipped back into his coma again.

KAYLA GIVES THE KIDS AN "I'M NOT BUYING THAT STORY" KIND OF
LOOK.

KAYLA

Am I really supposed to believe
that? Boy I was lyin' before you
were cryin'.

TARRIN

(blurting it out)

I'm the one who's been taking your
money.

(scared)

I'm the cat burglar.

EVERYONE STARES AT TARRIN.

TROY

See. I told you it wasn't me.

KAYLA

Tarrin, what possible excuse can
you have for stealing from your
own family?

TROY

I don't care what your excuse is,
you're gonna pay me back, you
little long-headed--

DAVONNA

I can't believe you just stood
there and let Troy take the rap
like that?

KAYLA

I don't understand it. You're
supposed to be the cute kid
everyone loves to hug, not Tarrin
the Terrible. I'd expect this sort
of thing from Troy, but not you.

TROY

See, looks can be deceiving.

KAYLA

I want an explanation, Tarrin, and
I want a darn good one too.

TARRIN LOOKS SAD AND REMORSEFUL.

TARRIN

(embarrassed,
hesitant)

I was using the money so I could
play this video game down at the
arcade.

TROY

An arcade game? Really? Since dad
is in a coma, let me kick his
butt, ma?

KAYLA

What are you, a video addict? Some
kind of cyber junkie?

TARRIN

No. I entered this contest and I
made it to the finals.

KAYLA

Is stealing from your own family
worth winning some contest in
front of a bunch of strangers?

TARRIN

No, I guess not. But I could win
two hundred dollars and pay
everybody back.

KAYLA

It's not even about the money.
Stealing is a serious crime and
this is where we nip it in the bud
mister, before it festers into
full-blown armed robbery or
kidnapping. You, my friend are
grounded for a whole month.
Understand me?

TARRIN

Yes ma'am. I'm sorry everybody.
Now I don't know how I'll pay you
back, or ever meet Rih-once'.

RAYDELL'S EYES SUDDENLY OPEN WIDE, AS THOUGH HE WAS A
MONSTER COMING BACK TO LIFE IN A HORROR FLICK.

TROY

Hey look! Dad's eyes popped open.
He's awake!

KAYLA

(rushing towards
Hal)

Ray! Thank God you're alive--

RAYDELL PUSHES HER AWAY.

RAYDELL

Tarrin, come to your father.

KAYLA IS OFFENDED. TARRIN WALKS OVER TO HIS FATHER.
RAYDELL GRABS HIS HAND AND SQUEEZES IT TIGHT. RAYDELL
BEGINS TO SALIVATE PROFUSELY.

RAYDELL

What did you just say, son?

DAVONNA

I said now I don't know how I'll
pay you back.

RAYDELL

Not that part. The last part.

TARRIN

Now I'll never get to meet Rih
once'?

RAYDELL

(excited)

Yes! Rih-once'! What does she have
to do with anything?

TARRIN

Winner of the Fancy Feet contest
gets two hundred dollars, plus
they get to be in Rih-once's next
music video.

RAYDELL

And win you shall!

RAYDELL WIPES THE DROOL FROM HIS LIPS AND HOPS OUT OF BED
WITH THE VITALITY OF A TWENTY YEAR OLD ATHLETE.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

To the car everybody!

THE NURSE ENTERS.

NURSE

Back in bed Superman. I've gotta
check your rectum for parasites.

INT. ARCADE - DAY (DAY 2)

SFX: VIDEO GAME SOUNDS

THE ARCADE IS PACKED WITH CHILDREN AS WELL AS ADULTS. A
HUGE SIGN HANGS OVER THE CROWD. IT READS, "FANCY FEET
CHAMPIONSHIP!"

TARRIN AND FAMILY ENTER THE PLACE.

RAYDELL

(discomfort)

I'm not sure that nurse was truly
qualified.

KAYLA

Just hobble slowly dear and don't
wonder off.

TROY

Can I go across the street to the
motor cycle shop?

KAYLA

No you may not. We're here to
support your brother, now shut up
and watch.

THE CROWD CHEERS FOR TARRIN.

DAVONNA

Wow. He's pretty popular here.

RAYDELL

Okay, as your father, I'm going to
help you get hyped, lit up or
whatever you kids do these days.
Is this anything like line
dancing?

TARRIN

(pleading)

Mom!

KAYLA

Honey maybe you should wait in the
car where you can be more
comfortable.

RAYDELL

Nope nope nope. Like Doug E. Fresh
says, we're on a mission.

THE CONTEST HOST ENTERS AND GRABS THE MICROPHONE. HE LOOKS
LIKE HE'S STRAIGHT OUT OF THE HOLLYWOOD HOST CATALOG,
COMPLETE WITH TUXEDO, STIFF DAZZLING SMILE AND MOUSSED UP
HAIR.

CONTEST HOST

(into mic)

Good evening everyone, it's the
moment you've all been waiting
for! The war on the dance floor!

THE CROWD CHEERS.

TROY

(whispering)

You better not embarrass me or so
help me...

CONTEST HOST

I'm Tony Patterson, your host for
this evening, but never mind the
gorgeous guy with the mic, let's
get on with the contest.

THE CROWD CHEERS.

CONTEST HOST (cont'd)

We started out with thirty
players, now we're down to the two
finalist! The winner will get two
hundred dollars, plus appear with
Rih-once' in her next music video.

THE CROWD CHEERS.

CONTEST HOST (cont'd)

Our first contestant, originating
out of Tampa Florida with an
average score of seventy-eight
thousand points per game,
seventeen years old, Vivian
Hayyyyyys!

THE CROWD CHEERS.

FEMALE VOICE (O.S.)

Beat him good, Vivian!

MALE

Yeah, we need that money!

TROY

(to himself)

She looks very mature for
seventeen.

CONTEST HOST

Contestant number two is a
hometown favorite with an average
score of seventy-six thousand plus
points. His name is Tarrin Brave!

THE CROWD CHEERS.

TARRIN AND VIVIAN STEP UP ON THE VIDEO GAME. THEY SNARL AT
EACH OTHER AS THEY SHAKE HANDS.

KAYLA

You can do it Tarrin!

RAYDELL

Do it for your dad!

CONTEST HOST

Are the players ready?

VIVIAN

Ready.

TARRIN

Ready.

CONTEST HOST

Insert your coins.

VIVIAN PUTS HER COINS INTO THE VIDEO MACHINE. TARRIN CHECKS
HIS POCKETS BUT COMES UP EMPTY. HE LOOKS OVER TO HIS
FAMILY.

TARRIN

I don't have any quarters.

TROY

I got you lil' bro. Here you go.

TROY REACHES INTO HIS POCKET AND HANDS TARRIN A COUPLE OF
COINS. TARRIN SMILES, THEN DROPS THEM INTO THE VIDEO GAME.

TARRIN

Thanks.

(to Vivian)

Good luck.

VIVIAN

Good luck to you too.

CONTEST HOST

Now let's get ready to daaaaaance!

VIVIAN SMILES AT TROY. HE SEEMS TO BE MESMERIZED.

TROY

Yo, she's got a nice smile.

DANCE MUSIC PLAYS

THE GAME BEGINS. VIVIAN AND TARRIN ARE DANCING WELL.

RAYDELL

This is nothing like line-dancing.

CONTEST HOST

Vivian and Tarrin are still going
at it, with neither opponent
showing any signs of weakness.

DAVONNA

They've been dancing for twenty
minutes so far.

RAYDELL

I don't care if he dances all
night. He must win! Come on son,
dance!

DAVONNA

Let's go Tarrin!

KAYLA

Yeah, let's go Tarrin!

TROY

She's pretty good.

KAYLA

(threatening)

What about your brother? He's
pretty good too, right?

TROY

(meek)

Yeah, of course.

KAYLA

Then how come you're not cheering
for him?

TROY

I was cheering on the inside.

KAYLA

You better not be flirting with
his opponent or so help me I'll
knock you outside--

TROY

I wasn't flirting, I was just
watching her--

RAYDELL

Uh-oh. Everybody hang on. Another
earthquake.

DAVONNA

Look, Tarrin is slightly ahead!
He's pulling away!

KAYLA

Dance Tarrin! Dance!

DAVONNA

You've got this!

SFX: LOUD BELL SOUNDS

CONTEST HOST

That means time is up. And the
winner is, Tarrin Brave!

RAYDELL

He did it! He did it!

DAVONNA

Woo!

TROY

(to himself)

I don't believe it. He beat my
girl.

KAYLA

I'm so proud of you, Tarrin!

DAVONNA

Nice footwork little brother!

RAYDELL

I knew you could do it, son.

(gives Tarrin a
"High-Five")

No more restrictions for the rest
of your life!

TARRIN

Yes! Can I get a big cake, ice
cream and a party too?

RAYDELL

Yeah, sure. Whatever you want. You
can pay me back when you get the
prize money.

INT. BRAVE'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

MUSIC PLAYS

THERE'S CAKE AND ICE CREAM ON THE TABLE. EVERYBODY
PARTIES.

RAYDELL

Woo! Woo!

KAYLA

Look at your father. I think he's
more excited than Tarrin.

DAVONNA

I know. You can hardly tell he was
ever sick.

KAYLA

Yeah, this turned out to be a
great day after all.

RAYDELL DANCES HIS WAY OVER TO KAYLA.

RAYDELL

(puckering his
lips)

Hey Honey, give me a kiss.

KAYLA

Not yet. I think you still have
pathogen residue on you lips.

RAYDELL

You know what? I don't care if I
have pathogens on my lips,
ptomaine in my liver or parasites
in my...

(embarrassed)

...Well, what I'm trying to say
is... Wait.

(to the DJ)

Turn the music off please! Please
turn the music off!

MUSIC OFF

RAYDELL GIVES A SPEECH TO HIS FAMILY.

RAYDELL (cont'd)

I have something I want to say to
Tarrin. You my son, may be a
thief, a liar and a burglar, but
none of that really matters right
now. What matters is, you're also
winner, and you've made your
father very happy.

KAYLA

All of us.

RAYDELL

You danced like a well-trained...
dancer. I thank you and I love
you.

TARRIN HUGS RAYDELL AS THE FAMILY CHEERS.

TARRIN

Love you too, Dad.

SFX: TELEPHONE RING

KAYLA

Let me get this real quick.

KAYLA GOES TO ANSWER THE PHONE.

RAYDELL

So Tarrin. You think Rih-once'
will let me be in the video?

KAYLA

(into phone)

Hello.... Yes it is....
What?... Excuse me...?

(upset)

That's impossible, there must be
some mistake... I see... Okay,
thank you. Good bye.

KAYLA HANGS UP THE PHONE THEN WALKS BACK OVER TO THE
FAMILY.

KAYLA (cont'd)

(unhappy)

That was the people from the Fancy
Feet contest. They said Tarrin's
been disqualified for cheating.

TARRIN

What?!

RAYDELL

No! No way!

DAVONNA

How could he have cheated?

TARRIN

Yeah, I danced my butt off!

KAYLA

We know you did, but they said you
put slugs in the game instead of
quarters.

EVERYONE STARES AT TROY.

TROY

Oh man. I must have given Tarrin
my vending machine slugs by
mistake. But it was an honest
mistake. I didn't mean to.

RAYDELL

Troy! You have just ruined my
life!

KAYLA

You wanted that cute little girl
to win didn't you?!

TROY

No. Wait a minute.

RAYDELL

You, my fine flirting friend, are
grounded for the rest of your
life! Right after I kill you!
Somebody hand me one of those
stiff cats outside.

FADE OUT.

END OF SHOW